[Roger Kaputnik]

From 2001 hence, entries are being posted on a web log titled "Owego Pennysaver Readers' Column."

The crazed, the concerned, and the just plain confused. They all find a forum in the "Your Two Cents Worth" column in the Broome County Pennysaver. Every week, citizens with high peeve-to-life ratios call in their nits to the bitch line. Some of the more ridiculous and sublime entries are reproduced below. All typographic, syntactic and logical errors have been preserved for your reading pleasure.

Cries in the dark from the equally angst-ridden populace of neighboring Tioga county are now included below! These items, from the Owego Pennysaver's Readers' Column, are indicated by "OPRC".

Last modified on March 2, 2001

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The other day I was in a local grocery store. There is a clock in this store that has not worked for months. Please get the clock fixed or take it down. It confuses the elderly.

OPRC 12/10/00

As an outsider moving into a small community I find the Readers' Column very amusing. It looks to me as though it is a bunch of old men sitting on the porch of someone's home and complaining about everything there is to complain about. I would much rather see people that are this unhappy with this area, New York State, politics, to move. If it's that bad, why sit around and complain about it every single week. Do something about it. Do something about your life. Quit being so bored. Whatever. Enough is enough. As an outsider looking in it's ridiculous.

OPRC 12/3/00

I'm calling in reference to the person who said they moved to Tioga County in the Spring of 2000 and they are being discriminated agaist because they are on SSD and they applied for help and can't get it. Poor baby! Move back to where you came from if you don't like it.

OPRC 12/3/00

On October 24 we saw a large back-and-white cat get hit on Main Street in Owego. We took him out of the street and gave him a proper funeral.

OPRC 11/5/00

I really agree that the employee at DMV was out of line by making crude remarks. Maybe the overweight woman had some kind of illness that made it hard for her to bathe. People who make comments like that really don't know all the facts.

OPRC 10/22/00

This is for the hunter who shot his dog while pheasant hunting on Oct. 20 at 6:10 p.m. on Michigan Hill Rd. in Richford. I heard you shoot, I heard your dog cry out in pain three times. Your faithful companion lays dead in a ditch across from where you parked your car. Your dog was trying to get to you for help, but you left him here to die. I hope you can sleep well.

OPRC 10/22/00


After hearing about the hunter who shot his dog and left it to die in a ditch, now I know why I hate hunters and hunting. Once people start killing animals they have no respect for living things at all. If your husband came home without his hunting dog you better be careful. You and the kids may be next.

OPRC 11/12/00

As a nearby resident of a local scrap yard I am deeply concerned by the large amount of fluff substance located on their site which appears to be smoking. I would like to know where I can get information about this fluff substance, it's flashponts and an evacuation plan of local residents if this mountain of fluff should catch fire.

OPRC 9/17/00

I just read the Readers' Column. It's nothing but a bunch of complaints.

OPRC 6/18/00

Here it is March 2000 and people have still got Christmas lights up. Especially those new fangled icicle lights. Don't you think it's time you take them down? They look cheap.

OPRC 3/19/00


I'm calling to request that people slow down on Montrose Turnpike and watch out for our pets. In the last two months, I've had a kitten that I loved squashed and my sidekick Boots, a beagle mix, was hit. No one stopped. Boots has been suffering greatly and so have I as a result. He had his chain on his neck because some how he had gotten loose from his run. I'm a disabled person and the x-rays were terribly expensive. It's been very traumatic.

OPRC 3/19/00

I would just like to inform whoever ran over my cat last week that it's okay. You don't have to feel guilty. The cat was old and living its final days, anyway. Had you not put the poor animal out of its suffering, I would have had to put it to sleep soon. Do not feel bad. You did it a favor.


Come on, all you Two Cent's Worth columnists. Let's get the phone calls coming in. The last few weeks there have hardly been any comments in this column. If you have a problem, let's get it off your chest.


I'm interested in knowing if anyone knows of a military school or discipline school for my children.


I have a complaint about the soft drink bottles that they make. They have made them so that they hardly stand up by themselves. I think the companies have them made that way so that kids spill them and then you have to buy more.


How can the people who do not believe in prayer help us get rain in this country during this drought?


To the person who was offended at OFA's graduation cermony by the prayer at the end of it. Why don't you move to Red China where the rest of your friends are?

OPRC 7/11/99

The people from upstate New York should thank Rudy Giuliani for cleaning up New York City by sending all his drug dealers upstate. He doesn't deserve one vote from anyone in upstate New York.


I thought we had a noise ordinance in the city. There are several cars that drive on East Frederick St. every day with the radio blaring so loud that it hurts my ears. The main culprits are a small white car and a small red car.


I've been to two restaurants recently and had hair in my food at both. I think that waitersses and cooks should at least wear hats.


To the driver of the maroon car, which was full of boys, that killed my white cat on Halseyville Rd. Friday evening. Thanks a lot. I was on the front porch and saw you. You will be remembered. You are supposed to stop, by law.

OPRC 6/6/99

I have men's and women's leather belts and I was wondering if someone could use them for a special project.


Could Owego please get a full service gas station? Older people can't pump their own gas. I can't pump mine because I can't get the gas cap off.

OPRC 5/2/99


This is in regards to the person who called and stated that there should be a full service gas station in Owego because they cannot get the gas cap off their car. If you cannot get the gas cap off your car, you should not be driving.

OPRC 5/9/99

Now that summer is upon us, these self-employed people are going out and mowing grass. They are hauling little trailers with their lawn mowers behind their trucks. I hope the police departments look at these trailers and make sure they have license plates on them.


Proposition 2 in Tioga Center passed by 20 votes from what I hear. Can't we get a revote on that?

OPRC 4/4/99

It's bad enough that addicts and drunks are considered handicapped and have the right to suck off free medicine, education and rent money from the hard working middle class. Now the post office has a special parking space for pregnant women. Pregnancy is not a handicap. It is the natural result of a conscious choice. Save the space for people with real handicaps.


I've driven through most parts of Johnson City and don't believe that there is anything that can't be fixed with a fleet of bulldozers and an army of dump trucks.


I'd like to know, what with school taxes going up, why are the kids never in school? I always see them in the mall. Why don't the kids spend more time in school?


The reason farmers are going out of business is simple. It's called NAFTA. Cheap beef is imported from Mexico. And the reason schools provide everything except education is simple, too. Democrats.

OPRC 1/31/99

I don't think that it's just El Nino that's giving us this crazy weather. I think it's the space program that's going on over our heads that's stirring things up.


I'm a hard working native American, who, like others has had bad luck. In one year's time I lost my job, my car and my home. I turned to Social Services for food stamps and was turned down. So, I went to the grocery store with a couple of dollars in my pocket to buy milk. In front of me at the register was a foreign lady with a lot of groceries and a handful of food stamps. Thank you, America.


I would like to say to dog owners, please pick up after your dogs. I walked through my front lawn recently and stepped in dog droppings. I was not aware of this and ended up getting it all over my living room carpet.


To all the people in the fast food restaurants. Why doesn't somebody come up with a hotdog now and then? I could go for a good Texas hotdog every once in a while.


This is in regards to the inconsiderate motorist who hit and killed our dog on Whittemore Hill Rd. about a month ago. It was not your fault that our dog ran into the street. He was only trying to protect us by barking at strangers. It was your fault for speeding and not looking where you were going.

OPRC 11/22/98

This is in regards to the inconsiderate motorist who hit our dog on Fri., Nov. 6 around 10 p.m. on Rte. 434 in Apalachin. It was not your fault that she got loose and I even believe that is is not your fault you hit her. It is your fault that you left her for dead in the middle of the road. If I am not mistaken, the law states that motorists are to at least make an honest effort to locate the owner. Thankfully, the vet told us that she will live. Unfortunately, she has nerve damage to her head and legs. Please remember that dogs and cats are part of someone's family most of the time.

OPRC 11/15/98

I had a grey cat who, unfortunately, went outside without my knowledge. Somebody hit her on Brown Rd. and just left her. I wish you could know how much that cat meant to me. You could have at least stopped and let me know that you hit her. I might have been able to take her to the vet and save her. But it wasn't until the next day that I found her in the middle of my yard. I hope whoever hit her sleeps well tonight. I know I'm not sleeping very well.

OPRC 11/15/98

As a concerned taxpayer in Owego, I'm happy that the bums in Owego will have $200 garbage cans to sleep in. I hope that the lid comes with a Bose stereo and that the edges are padded. I'm sure we could spend $3,000 on something more urgent than 15 garbage cans. For $200 they should empty themselves.

OPRC 11/1/98

I am a senior citizen with arthritis in my knees and ankles. I am in desparate need of water excericises. I live near a local facility in Endicott where they have water classes, but you have to climb to the second floor to get to it.


There's been a truck for sale in Owego for two months now. I just wondered how long it's going to take the owner to get the message that, apparently, no one is going to buy it.

OPRC 10/25/98

I'd like to respond to the person whose daughter lost a sweater at Nathan T. Hall School in Newark Valley. My son attends the middle school and every year he has lost jeans within the first week of school. I don't know how parents can let their children walk around with somebody elses clothes on. I am getting tired of spending good money on jeans to have them disappear overnight. There really should be a better lost and found system.

OPRC 10/25/98

There's a farm house on Moore Hill Rd. in the town of Nichols where I think between three hundred and five hundred marijuana plants are grown every year. Will something be done about this?

OPRC 10/25/98


I'm calling about the alleged marijuana farm on Moore Hill Rd. I wonder if that's the same farm that had the illegal deer hanging in the silo.

OPRC 11/22/98

At one time ties were collected to make rugs and other things. Does anyone know who to contact to donate ties?


Does anyone know who collects used golf balls?


Please stop publishing letters about cat hair. You've had more than enough and we're tired of it. Please stop it.


I'd like to talk a little bit about the fast food business. I feel when people come to a drive up at the fast food, the manager or who ever is in charge of the fast food should put a limit to the number of items you can order at the window, especially if somebody is by themselves.


Come on parents. I went to the grocery store today, and I was hit in the shins twice because a little kid was pushing your cart. This is not a place for kids to push carts. I mean, then he knocked down a display and you just let him do it.


This is to the nosy woman who turned me into Social Services for my child being in my automobile sleeping with the air conditioner running, strapped in the car seat in Eckerd's parking lot, door locked while I was in the same parking lot buying vegetables. I saw you nosing around. It's none of your business. I have four kids and one is 11 years old. Yes, he lived to be 11 without your help. It's better to have him sleeping in an air conditioned vehicle than out in the 80 degree sun. I was out of the automobile for maybe five minutes at the most and could see my automobile and you nosing around. I was wondering what your problem was. You just walked away when you saw me coming. You're one of those people that like to nose around and cause trouble. If you thought it was so wrong, why didn't you confront me? Probably because it wasn't any of your business and you know that's what I would have told you.

OPRC 9/20/98

I'm calling in regard to Binghamton police. My son was smacked across the head by a grown man and nothing was done about it, yet if I was to touch my son like that, I'd be arrested for child abuse. What's going on these days in society? Hello!?


I'm calling to remind people to not place ads in the newspaper for free animals to give away, especially cats and kittens. Though there are people out there that would give your animals a good home, there are more that would promise a good home to you and take these pets home and abuse and kill them.

OPRC 9/6/98

I'm caling concerning the nonsmoking Bingo's. I smoked for years and they took my money and let me play Bingo. Now, all of a sudden, I can't smoke anymore. They have a lot of people at Bingo. They might not smell like smoke, but some of them could sure use some soap and deodorant. They really smell bad. When you don't smell smoke, you smell B.O. I'd rather smell smoke, personally, They really need to wash and get their act together.


I live in Binghamton and recently I was punched in the right side by somebody. I called the Binghamton Police and they said there was nothing they could do about it because they don't know who the person was.


On July 24th wrestling was at the Broome County arena. There was a man with a 35 mm taking pictures of a woman behind my family. Then he put a longer lens on. Yelling at my sons to sit down. Put your signs down. Then a man with a video started the same thing. She had a sign stating, "Suck on These". Meaning her breasts. At one point she pulled her top up showing her bra. The she took her bra off. My children had to see this. It went up on the big screen also. She is a stripper. Well, this was not a bar. It was a special event. She sould have been arrested and taken out of the Arena. It was in poor taste for the WW Federation to have cameramen that would take her topless and put it on the screen. The Arena should have taken action right away. If a man showed his private parts he would have been arrested. What is the difference?


I was looking out my window the other morning and saw a woman walking her dog and she scooped up the poop and threw it in the storm drain. Is this what the police mean by a scooper law?


I would just like to say that if we are calling New York the Welfare State, we can definitely now call Tioga the Welfare County.

OPRC 8/2/98

This goes to the person who decided to dispose of two innocent kittens in the Wal-Mart parking lot. I don't know what you were thinking about when you caused the senseless murders of two kittens. Apparently you have no conscience. If you did not want those kittens, there are other methods of having them taken care of. What you did was nothing but a cowardly act.


I am a mother, a grandmother and a great grandmother. I resent having to walk three blocks into town when the parking spaces on Washington Street are filled with people who have expired meters.


It seems as though more and more I see many young girls with babies. Fifteen, sixteen, seventeen years old. It's just unbelievable. Also, I noticed that sometimes when you look at these young teenagers you don't know if it's a boy or a girl the way they're dressed. When I was young, if you looked like a boy, a boy wouldn't look at you.


I've yet to come across any good schools - Catholic, Christian, or public. They're all one big cesspool.

OPRC 6/28/98

I'm calling to talk about these stupid prank callers calling my house every five minutes leaving obscene messages on my answering machine. I think it should be stopped.


I was in a local donut shop in Binghamton. I went in there to get some coffee and as I went through the place of business the door was open going into the bakery. There was a lady standing there changing baby diapers on a table that they make donuts on. I just thought I'd let the reader's know to be careful eating donuts in this donut shop. Somebody's going to get sick. It's not a good practice to change baby diapers on a table that's being used for donuts.


I'm trying to figure out why your column is all about elderly people complaing about other elderly people and little, petty, stupid things. Maybe if instead of having a phone number, you had an e-mail address you'd get rid of the elderly and uneducated and not hear about things that people don't really care about.


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